Why? well... since i have been here (here being Troy, NY, RPI, 12500 miles away from home), I have had SO MUCH that I have wanted to share with eveyone back home. Mostly because I haven't quite found the same kind of friends here - or at least haven't know the friends I do have for long enough, which is probably the case. And when I do talk to people back home, I can't remember which stories I have told to whom.... so I get really repetitive.
So much has happened in the past month or so that I have been here. It's ridiculous.
Hmm.. where to start...
Well, I could start by mentioning how different the people are here - both because it's the East coast, and also because it is RPI.
'Minnesota nice' does not exist here. Walking down the street smiling is a common occurance in my daily life, and that is rather abnormal here. People look at me like "what the heck are you looking at?" .. .or they just look confused. And if I say "hi" to a stranger.. well... that is just plain weird. People keep to themselves here. Eye contact with a passing stranger is uncommon. A smile is unseen. It's hard to get used to. I smile anyway :)
Ok, another thing: RPI. It's not so different now that things have settled, people have found their various groups of friends, and classes are well underway. But Student Orientation, and Navigating Rensselaer and Beyond (like welcome week) were much different. For one, the ratio: the ratio is very hard to get used to at first. It is 3 guys to every girl. And the guys can be very forward here. For instance, on a shuttle to Wal-Mart (which is unfortunately the only shopping nearby), most of the spots were taken and the two girls I was with decided to sit in the only two adjacent open seats. I sat down next to a nice-looking guy and introduced myself, as everyone does during welcome week. We had a normal conversation: name, major, dorm, home state. He was from Brooklyn, so somehow that evolved into the topic of pizza. When the bus neared our destination, he asked me for my number. I'm just not used to that. I'm not sure if i'll ever be. And varying things have happened along those lines since: just people wanting to hang out sometime when i met just them about 5 minutes earlier. It's just interesting.
Oh, and another thing. RPI (Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute) is a really nerdy school. It's an engineering school. People honestly go here to become rocket scientists. Sometimes... most times... i feel incredibly out of my league. And I think it is hilarious when people hear that I am an architecture major and they say "Oh, wow, you must be really smart!!" It baffles me. hahaha
To keep this short(er) for now, I'll only tell one other story. Well, it's an ongoing story. My sociology class has been quite the experience. My professor, Sal Restivo, is apparently a very well-known sociologist, and very very adamant atheist. He also is not a fan of people voicing their opinions in class. He, and many other sociologists apparently, claim that god is simply created by society. We have different “good feelings’ that we have when in a large group or when the group is creating music, etc; that feeling is then set outside us and given to some deity we create.
I think it has been a really good, challenging class so far. I am using at a way to learn “the other side” and why they believe what they believe. But I hadn't had a ton of actual involvement until this one day. One morning he asked who believed in a god, which he had done once before, and I raised my hand along with a few other students. The previous time he had asked, there were a few more hands, and this time the few hands were much more tentative. When I had my hand raised he asked me, “Why do you believe in the existence of a god?” I said something along the lines of, ‘I have had too much happen in my life for there not to be one. Coincidence can only go so far.” He kind of cut me off and said, “Oh, so it is by personal experience then, right?” I said yes. He then asked if I could share more about that sometime.
He said "not today, but ‘later.’" I said that I would. After, he asked another guy in the back of the classroom why he believed in a god, and he said that we had to start from something – the creation of life doesn’t make sense without someone there before it. My professor, Dr. Restivo, then proceeded in trying to disprove this belief. He also discussed how the Bible must not be true because there are too many translations and interpretations to understand it correctly.
Throughout this part it was more the professor stating his views, as it usually is. I am the only one that has been singled out to share her beliefs. Though I do not know if I will ever have an opportunity to share as much as I know and believe and ‘prove’ God as he says, I am more or less singled out as ‘the believer’ in the class. It's a pretty weighty task, but I am excited that I have this opportunity. But, honestly I am scared. My prof is one of the leaders in his field and has very good debate skills. Usually he is easily able to refute any of my classmate’s arguments in a matter of seconds. As my mom says, "He eats freshmen for breakfast."
I know that God has something planned in all of this, though I have no idea what it is. It is crazy to think that he would use me – who is so young and a little out of her league. But it is so encouraging to know that He has used so many others. And I know that He can use anyone. I keep coming back to Ezekiel 2 and 3:1-15. It has been such an encouragement.
Anyway... this whole sociology class has taught me a lot. It has taught me not to simply assume the beliefs of those around me, and especially those of the Christian culture, as my own and as absolute truth. It can be so hard sometimes. It is not exactly "fun" to have your beliefs challenged every Tuesday and Friday, 12:00-2:00, and question your beliefs anytime you study sociology or happen to be thinking about the subject. And, truthfully, I have had a lot of doubts lately. Again, it is so hard. Thankfully, God, being the amazing Daddy that he is, chooses to show up. On a daily basis, often. And that is truly incredible. I can honestly say that I have had God show up more often in the past month than at any other time in my life. Who has that? Sometimes it is in simple ways, like an incredibly beautiful day, or a day when I feel down and receive an unnecessary random beautiful compliment. But sometimes it is in ways that keep me grinning from ear to ear for days. Like one day when I was feeling distant from God (fresh from a sociology class, i think) and just doubting so many things, a girl asked me if I was a Christian. I said yes, and she told me that she had seen me wearing a shirt with a verse on it one day. And above that, she said she "could just tell." It shocked me to see how Christ could still be very present in my life, even when i didn't really feel like it. And so many other things have happened as well.... but I will save those for another note another day.....
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